I Love You To Love Me
by themoojournals
Summary: a story about the heartache, struggles, and love of being a teenager with a few extra priorities.
1. Chapter 1

"kids! Come on, your gunna be late for school." my mother screeched at the top of her lungs. My brothers and I made our way down the stairs as I spoke on my cell phone to Kaylen. "I know Spence, I miss you too. I gotta go though… bye."

I hung up the phone and sighed. Why does it have to be so hard? Being gay and coming out wasn't bad, it was the reaction and after affect that made it horrible. Actually, thinking back, I knew how my parents would react…I knew they would hate me and I knew that my mom would try her hardest to make my life miserable.

_-flashback-_

"_mom, I … can I talk to and dad for a minute?" I asked, my nerves were getting to me and I needed to do this now before I lost the braveness._

"_of course sweetie." my mother said, obviously not noticing my weary expression. They sat down in the living room together in the love seat, making my insides twist and curdle._

"_guys…you know that don't like disappointing you, and I would only hate myself more if I happen to do that." I said quietly. My mother's confused face only fueled me more. "uhm…" I look over to my dad and see a knowing smile on his face. His eyes twinkled with kindness and I sighed in relief. "im gay." the pressure on my chest was released and I could feel the weight on my shoulders drop._

"_alright jokes over." my mom said coldly. My eyes bulged and I look to my dad for support. His face held the same amount of confusion if not more._

_SMACK! The sound of her hand slapping against my face could be heard throughout the house and it echoed menacingly._

" _you disgust me!" she whispered with venom. "Paula!" my dad's voice held shock and for some reason I couldn't stand it. I should of known she would be like this…I should of known it._

_That night…my dad died in a car accident._

_-end flashback-_

"Spencer!" clay yelled snapping me out of my daze. "huh…what?" I ask agitated.

"we need to go lezbo!" glen said meanly, he never forgave me for ruining the family…

We walked to the car and drove to my new high school. Hell school. King high school. When glen finally parked after an hour of us yelling for him to just pick one, we noticed all the students gathering around a little circle of people chanting "fight! fight! Fight!"

"sweet!" yelled glen as he ran to se who was fighting. I ran after him, I was curious after all. When I got there I saw that it wasn't a fight between two boys, it was between 2 girls. I looked at the scene and one girl was laying on the ground as a pretty Latino was laughing, along with a boy who could be a male model. The girl on the ground shifted, unconsciously, I walked through the crowd and kneeled down next to her. She was absolutely beautiful.

The crowd diminished when I glared in their direction. The girl who was laughing walked up to me and towered over my kneeling body. She sarcastically said, "thanks, now you can take care of the dyke,"

I looked back down to inspect the girl after they walked away. I shook her gently but when she didn't get up, I got worried. She truly was gorgeous except for the nasty cut above her eye, and an already forming bruise on her chin. No doubt where she was punched. I slowly turned her over fully and got clay: who was watching quietly: to carry her to the bathroom…the girls bathroom. Considering it was our 2nd day of school, clay nor I cared if we were late. Clay placed her on the couch in the bathroom and I nodded, silently telling him he could leave.

When he walked out I went up and out a wet paper towel over her cut and wiped carefully. no need for infections. After I cleaned her up, I was going to take her to the nurse. I was almost certain that she had a concussion. Before I got the chance to pick her up, her eyes opened and she sat up abruptly. "who are you?" she asked me quietly.

"Spencer. im sorry, I uh…um." I was stuttering, great. Now she thinks im intimated. She just nodded and then her face fell suddenly. "ugh…damn!" she practically screamed, gripping her temples. I rush towards her and grab her face gently. I had to see if her pupils were dilated, having a doctor for a mom really help out.

Her pupils were huge, great she has a really big concussion. "um...what's your name sweetie?" I ask gently, having more confidence. She looked around and then got off the couch. She stood there for a moment and then settled her gaze on her shoes. "Ashley Davies." she said self consciously. I smiled and then nodded my head in gratitude that she could remember her name.

"um…could you tell me the date please?" I ask "February 15th 2009." she said a little more confidently.

"good." I say. I took a step back noticing how close were. "okay well you should probably go to the nurse. You'll need stitches." I say nervously because I probably sound like a nerd.

"thank you." she says and walks out. "your welcome Ashley." I say more to myself.

Its been a week since then and Ashley and I have become close. I would consider us best friends but I could call her a pretty close one. She's the only one who actually has been nice to me and according to her, vice versa.

Its lunch right now, am I alone? Yes. But that's only because Ashley is getting a yogurt. Ugh, I cant stand the stuff, but this is Ashley's third. So apparently "its so good you could have an orgasm." her words not mine.

"humm" Ashley sighed and sat down with a spoon in her mouth "ash?" I asked with a smile. "yes?" she asks with her eyes closed. "please don't cum at school, we can wait till we get to my house." I say mocking a serious tone, and keeping my smile at bay.

"what…what?" she said redder then a tomato. I crack a smile to show that im joking when I see a sly smile grace her features. "well Spence, im almost certain, you'll cum before I do." she says playing along

Oh I know how to play this game. "we could find out." I say sliding close and resting my hand on her I could feel the warmth coming from her as she blushed.

"okay…you win." she said laughing, "sweet." I say with a victory dance - well, the best I could do, sitting down.

She noticed we were still close and my hand hadn't moved. I knew what was coming. "sorry" I whisper.

"you're gay, aren't you?' she blurted out. "umm…" I didn't know what to say. What if she's homophobic. "don't worry I don't care." she said reassuring me. I looked at her doubtful, but she just smiled waiting for definite answer.

"yeah I am" I whisper. She got up and walked away. Oh my god. She left! I could feel the tears rim my eyes when I felt a presence sit down closer to me. looked over and see her sitting centimeters away. "I threw away the yogurt." she says smiling softly.

I nodded think of how stupid I was to think she would leave me there. We sat softly and silently, a comfortable silence over came us and she slid her hand into mine, locking our fingers together. I looked at her questioningly, and she nodded her head yes. She's gay too…she's gay too!

"dyke!" I heard across the quad. I looked over to see a freshman girl go flying into the air, her books going everywhere. "hey!" yelled Ashley standing up. "oh it's the other fag." the jock sneered. "you leave her alone!" Ashley yelled stomping up to him and sizing him up.

I jumped up as did the freshman, she punched the guy in the ribs causing him to laugh. "ha!' he laughed at her weakness. Then he pushed her back down causing ash to snap.

"grr!" Ashley growled a red angry glow around her. She jumped on the jocks back causing to lose is balance slightly. He slammed her into a wall by pushing himself backwards. "ah!" she gasped in pain, then winced. The jock took a step forward and I saw Ashley fall to the ground. "damn it" I say running over to her.

"Ashley ?" I ask. "im okay, just please go check on my sister." she says. "you sister?" im confused, then it clicked. The freshman. I go over to her, she's trying to get her books up while the jock yells obscene things as his buddies drag him away. "hey?" I say more as a question.

"hey." she says in monotone. "um here." I say handing her some of her papers.

"thanks, im Gracie. So im guessing you're the Spencer?" she asked.

"_THE_ Spencer? Um I guess." I say confused.

"Ashley talks about you a lot." Gracie was pretty, almost exactly looking like ash. a lot smaller though, maybe 5'2, 105 pounds. She had auburn hair and bright whisky colored eyes. The only difference of them, She had an innocent doe eyed look about her face. Unlike ash who was pure rebel.

"okay…well your alright right?" I ask.

"yeah im fine, just a little sore on my ego."

"I see. So um…are you gay too?" I ask. What? Cant I be curious. "me? No, no, no. they just call me that because of…-" She stopped talking when Ashley walked over and sat with us. -we were still on the ground- "…her!" she finished angrily. Ashley looked confused. "its all your fault Ashley Danielle!" she yelled.

"my fault? Maybe next time your drunk you wont make out with my current!" Ashley retorted. "make out? Its called body shots!"

"oh really? Then why did you have a hickey the next day?"

"just shut up!" her sister yelled, grabbed her bag and ran away.

"ugh!" Ashley grunted and stood up. I just sat there confused, still on the ground. "aren't you coming?" Ashley said slightly aggressive. "um yeah."

"here." she said more gently, holding her hand out for me. I take her hand and she pulls me up…really hard.. I ended up really close to her. "um…" she says. I blushed and stepped back. "I think we better get to class." I say, just now noticing the quad was empty.

"oh um, do you wanna skip, I can drive you home at 3."

"sure" As we pulled up, it looked like a large mansion. "yep, this is home." she said reading my thoughts. We got out of the car and she was staring at her phone and biting her lip…looking cute might I add. "its 12:05." she states.

"um…is that bad?" I ask "cori is taking her nap." she says matter of factly

Cori? Who is cori?. Now im really confused. She must have seen my face because she answered before I asked. "cori is my dau…sister. The nanny watches and she takes her naps from 11:30 to 12:15."

"oh okay. Well don't worry, we'll be extra quiet.' I reassure her. "thanks." She opens the door and pulls me inside quickly while she shuts threw door behind. "do you wanna see her?" she asks hopefully.

"sure ash." I couldn't say no. she looked so proud of her little sister.\ We walked upstairs as I admired her house, we then reached a door with a sign that said cori. She opened it and I saw a little pink bed in the corner with a lump in the middle.

Ashley walked over to the lump and sat beside it. "cori…wake up sweetie." she said gently and lightly shook the lump. "ashwee?" cori said lifting her self up.

She had shoulder length blonde hair that curled at the ends. Tan skin and deep brown eyes. Her bright green sleepwear was wrapped and twisted around her little body. She must be at least 2 or 3 years old. "hi baby!" Ashley said brightly.

"ashwee!!" cori screamed and jumped into her lap. She looked at me, just now noticing that there was someone else in the room. "whoo awr yooh?" cori asked my in her little voice. "cori, this is Spencer, she came home with me." Ashley told her.

"hi cori." I said walking over and kneeling beside ash. "hi thpenther ." she said shyly Cori shyly let go of ash and come towards me slowly. She touched my arm and pulled back fast. Ashley and I laughed.

She looked at my face carefully and broke into a fit a giggles. She jumped on to my lap and hugged me tight. "is shee gonna be my knoo mommy?" she asked innocently looking up at me hopefully.

"cori, we talked about this didn't we? No one is going to replace Christine, alright?" Ashley said sternly. Tears formed in her eyes as she got up and walked out of the room and went to her play room across the hall, then shut the door. "humm." Ashley sighed. She looked around and smiled softly.

"if you don't mind me asking…who's Christine?"

" she was our mom. She and my dad died in a car accident last year." she said.

"oh Ashley im so sorry." I say and hug her awkwardly. I was never good with things like this, "its just so hard ya know? I had to pay off social services just to keep cori here. Gracie's in foster care, but I just want my sister back. But taking care of two kids? When one isn't mine?" she cried.

_Wait…what?_

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	2. Chapter 2

"_its just so hard ya know? I had to pay off social services just to keep cori here. Gracie's in foster care, but I just want my sister back. But taking care of two kids? When one isn't mine?" she cried._

"wait…ash I thought both were you sisters…" She looked like a deer caught in the headlights. "okay…another conversation for another time." I said reassuring her. I already figured cori was hers. She couldn't be Gracie's because she's only around 15. She smiled and hugged me tighter.

"c'mon, we better go get her. She can watch a movie with us." she said standing up. I followed suit and we walked to the room across the hall. I heard a barney song playing out of a karaoke machine, as her little voice came through the speakers.

When we walked in, the cutest scene presented itself in front of my eyes.

"I wov ooh

Ooh wove me

Wets hang bwarnie

Fwom a twee

Wif a knife in te throught

And a bwullet in te head

Wets thank gwod that

Bwarnies dead!"

She sang the dirty version, undoubtedly taught by ash, in front of her Barbie and stuffed animal audience. "Yay!" screamed Ashley, running to cori, scooping hr up and holding her upside down, "again! Again!" cori yelled excitedly.

"no, c'mon corr, were going to go watch a movie with Spencer okay?" she said.

"otay." cori got down and came over to me, holding out her little hand for me to take. "okay." I say.

And were off.

The credits were rolling down the screen, and no one was getting up to shut the DVD player off. Not because we didn't want to. But because cori was laying across our laps and we couldn't move sleeping beauty here. "Ashley Danielle Davies." I said quietly "um…okay?" she said confused.

"nothing, just admiring how pretty it sounds."

"thanks Spencer Erin Carlin, yours too." she replied.

"mommy…mommy! No, no, no! please don't go!" yelled cori in her opened her tears stained eyes and said, "ashwee, I want mommy."

"I know sweetie." she said and lifted cori up to her chest as she nestled into her neck."ill go." I get up when Ashley stops me.

"please don't the nanny's gone for the weekend." she asked me to stay the night so I did.

"I won't leave you ash, I promise." I say right after I called my mom of course…who wasn't happy to actually make human contact with me. But was happy to get rid of me for the rested her head on my chest as cori still rested hers on Ashley's.

"when did you have her?" I ask out of the blue. "I was raped when I was 14, but I didn't have her till a few months after my 15th birthday. She's almost 3, just 2 more weeks." she told me.

"im glad you told me." I began. "you seem very proud to be her mom."

"I am…she's my baby girl." she says softly.

"you're a good mom, even if you're a sister." I say smiling. in response she leaned in a kissed my cheek.

"thanks" she said.

"anytime." The weekend went by quickly. Too quickly, if you ask me.

And for sure, im so in love with cori. When I left Sunday night, she totally started sobbing and saying: "don't!" and "please don't leave me!" so I promised to come over today, Tuesday. I couldn't yesterday because I had to baby sit these twin brats from across the street. Grr what monsters.

Im in Spanish class right now, its so boring. Not to mention that the teacher keeps staring at me…wait a sec! Every body is. Geez didn't there mother ever tell them not to stare. "miss carlin!"

Oh shit, did I day that out loud? "sorry" I mutter. The bell rings and I bolt out of here, I run into the bathroom and look in the mirror, nothing in my hair…nothing on my face…nothing on my…

.GOD!

Someone taped a sign on my back saying:

I MAY BE GAY BUT ILL FUCK ANYTHING WITH TWO LEGS

Can you believe that? Who ever did this is going to pay…big time! Ugh! I cant even think straight.

I rip the sign off, fold it up and shove it into my back pocket. When I walk out, people start laughing and pointing at me. I rush out the doors of the school.

Im running.

And running.

I find myself a the bus station and I know right away where im going to go. Ashley's house. Its 11:30 so I have 20 minutes until Cori's nap is over. What? I need to talk to someone, why not a 3 year old who understands me more then my own mother. Besides…I miss her.

I arrived at Ashley's house. Lets just say the nanny wasn't very happy to see some 16 year old girl, wanting to see a 2 year old…who isn't even hers. After an hour of interrogation, she let me pass. At least cori's nap I over. I walked into the room to see her sitting up and rubbing her eyes tiredly. Awe poor baby, she must of just got up. "cori!" I sing songed into the room.

"spencey!" she screamed and ran towards me. She crashed into my arms and hugged me tight. "hi baby, I came to play with you today. " I say still hugging her "I wov ooh." she said quietly.

" I love you too sweetie." I said smiling.

"Spencer…can you please, please, please! be my new mommy.?" she asked with wide eyes.

" we'll have to talk to Ashley okay?"

"otay."

For hours we played babies, watched barney, and even baked brownies…which of course ended in disaster. At 3 we were in her play room talking and giggling. About everything. That little 2 year old was, what I thought, the most beautiful little girl in the world. We heard the front door open and my ears picked up yelling, then a pause. Ashley must be mad at someone on the phone.

(on the phone)

"I don't care what the fuck you do, you will find out who did that, and then your going to kick their ass."

-pause-

"no, no, no. listen to me, if you don't find out who did that to Spencer, her rep could be ruined.

-pause-

"okay…"

-pause-

"alright…c-ya soon." I heard footsteps and then a gasp outside cori's door, across the hall.

"cori?" Ashley panicked. By that time I was sure she was going to have a heart attack. I picked up cori and walked out the playroom. Ashley was still calling cori's name, when I walked behind her. "Ashley…cori is right here." I say trying to stifle a laugh.

She turned with a smile.

"what are doing here?" she asks. I reached into my pocket and pull out the wrinkled note, handing it to her.

"do you know who did this?" she demanded.

Ooh, demanding. that's definitely hot. Ugh…answer her question dummy…friggin horn dog.

"I don't know…I saw it...then people started laughing at me…I came here." I saw her angry face, great. She's mad that I came over here uninvited. "sorry." I put cori down and started for the door

"wait! Im sorry. Im just so mad someone would do this to you." she says gently. she's not mad I came here? "your not mad im here?" I ask doubtfully.

"of course not."

Cori, who was watching from a distance was getting fidgety. "what's up with you cori?" ash asked her.

"canspencerbemynewmommy?" she asked at sonic speed. "um…what?" Ashley looked confusedly at me.

"please Ashley…please…!" cori whined gently. Almost sent me to tears seeing her like this. Ashley smiled slyly

"only if Spencer will be my girlfriend." she whispered.


	3. Chapter 3

"only if Spencer will be my girlfriend." she whispered. Cori looked at me and pouted cutely.

"um…ash I-" I was cut off by lips on mine. Her lips were soft, and she didn't force her tongue down my throat like guys.

I felt her tongue run across my bottom lip and I granted her entrance. Our tongues fought for dominance as I moaned into her mouth. she pulled back. "will you…please?'

"Yes Ashley. Ill be your girlfriend." Cori screamed out of joy and started chanting,

"Spencer, yeah Spencer. She's my mommy, my new mommy."

Over and over and over. We laughed but I stopped abruptly.

"ash…I need to talk to you." I say quietly. we step into the playroom real quick.

'if im her new mom, then she should know that im dating her other mom" I explain. She hesitates but nods her head and walks back to cori. I decide to wait out here as she tells her. Its their moment, not mine. I just hope that cori will understand the situation and recognize Ashley s her real mommy.

20 minutes later they walked out hand in hand as cori held tight against Ashley's leg. I smiled, she must be scared she'll lose her. Just like Christine.

"cori…do you want some ice cream?" ash asks quietly.

"yes mommy." she whispered. Ashley's eyes gleamed with pride as cori said this.

She took my hand and we walked down the long staircase to the kitchen. "hehehe" cori giggled at some thing sponge bob said, a big bowl of strawberry ice cream in her lap.

Ashley and sat in the love seat, laying against each other, and gazing at the TV in front of us. I however couldn't concentrate on what squidward was complaining about. I was too inebriated on the smell of Ashley. Coconut vanilla and something pure Ashley. Her gorgeous locks were spawn across my chest and shoulder, where her head rest.

I smiled when I saw Ashley look lovingly at cori. "you did so good Ashley." I whisper. I felt shaking and I knew she was crying so I wrapped my arms around her. "sssh…Ashley im so proud of you," I say in her ear.

"you're a good mom, you're a good mom"

"mama?" cori said, seeing Ashley against my chest. Both of us look up.

"what's wrong with mommy?" she asked.

I smiled, she had referred to me as her mamma. Maternal instinct kicked in and I opened my one arm out motioning for cori to come on my lap. She climbed up and snuggled into us.

"are you gunna weave me?" cori asked Ashley and I both shook our heads

"fank yooh."

I woke up the next day and noticed we were in the same position last night, minus Ashley. "Ash?" I called softly, not wanting to wake cori.

I got up and placed cori in my place, wrapping a blanket around her frail body. I heard voices near the front door.

"your supposed to be in jail!" cried Ashley.

"well im not bitch!" There was a slapping sound and then a thud.

"maybe this time it wont struggle." the man said. I ran to see what was happening. "no! please…ugh!" Ashley screamed I got to the hall outside the front door and saw a man laying over him thrusting himself into my baby.

"stop! Please…aahh!" she was screaming in pain. I ran and tackled the man off of her.

"get off her!" I yelled. He saw that there was a witness and ran out the door.

"oh god…" Ashley moaned. I kneeled beside her and pulled her shirt down and her underwear back up

"come on baby." I say gently.

"please…no please." she whimpered.

"its ok baby…its Spencer, its Spencer."

"Spencer…" she sobbed and curled into a ball. I wrapped my arms around her and rocked back and forth. I had no reassurances for her this time. "mommy?" cori questioned, walking cautiously in.

"cori, go on the phone and dial 9-1-1, okay?" I said hurriedly. Apparently Ashley had taught her about that number because pure terror graced her innocent face. She ran into the kitchen and dialed the number.

"9-1-1 what's your emergency?"

"my momma is holding my mommy, and their both cwying." cori sniffled and wiped at her eyes, her own body shaking in fear.

"how old are you sweetie?"

"fwee" she responded, her voice wavered and the woman on the other line noted it.

"do you know what happened?" she asked gently, prodding the little girl into ttelling her further.

"mommy was scweaming and cwying and a bad man was here, and my momma pushed him off of her"

"were tracing your call baby girl, what's your name?" the woman asked and got ready to type in the address as it traced.

"Cori Davies."

"stay on the phone okay?"

"Otay." Cori continued to talk to the operator as Ashley fell asleep in my arms.

The ambulance came… "please ma'am…keep the little one safe. Maxwell Montgomery is a dangerous criminal, and we haven't caught him." the police officer said.

"wha...what?" I asked shocked. They left and I was alone in a big mansion, with a scared little girl who doesn't know what's going on.

A knock sounded in the large house and it echoed loudly.

I tried to keep quiet, as I put my shaking hand over cori's mouth and my other over my own.

"im here to get my daughter…" an overly cheerful voice came through the thick redwood door.

_Oh shit…_

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	4. Chapter 4

**I AM SO SORRY! my 1 month hiatus is over for good. there's been so much drama with moving into a new apartment and my parents getting a divorce. But it's a good thing so no worries here. XD I hope this update is good enough for ya, it would've been like double the length but considering its almost midnight on a Monday…well im sure my mom will walk in any minute telling me to…**

**I gotta go. :|**  


* * *

I couldn't think straight, cori was hugging my leg tightly as she fortunately cried as quiet as possible.

"cori…hide in the closet okay? And be very quiet." I whispered. She followed my instructions and quickly hid in the linen closet.

"um…Im sorry s-sir you h-h-have the wrong ad-dress." I stuttered. Just then he ripped through the door sending me to the ground in shock.

"bitch! I know ur lying. Where the slut's kid!?" he screamed at me. I jumped at Ashley's defense when he slapped me hard across the face. "don't you dare stand up to me." he sneers at me while he holds me up by my hair.

"please…don't hurt me! I swear, I don't know where cori is." I pleaded and begged but a noise in the closet snapped me back to reality and I saw his enraged eyes look at closet while knowing smile made its way onto his face. "oh cori.." he said in a cheery harmonistic voice.

Being the little naïve girl she is, she came out with a slight smile which disappeared when she saw the position I was in. he threw me on the ground. I heard cracking in my chest as I gasped in pain. He laid her on the ground and got on top of her as she whimpered and pounded on his chest with her little fists. "this only hurt for a little while _pumpkin." _he said with a fake caring voice.

"no please youre going to hurt her!" I screamed but it was too late, he was forcing his fingers into her, as she screamed in pain and agony, ripping her innocence out of her. I quickly got up and stumbled slightly as I threw myself at him causing him to fall. I grabbed the crying child and held her close to my chest . I kicked him in the head, causing him black out. I took this chance to run, so did.

I ran the 10 blocks to the hospital and am met with a very confused clerk. Cori had blood dripping down her leg as her hands cupped herself where she was violated. "please…can you help….us." I wheezed, as felt my ribs ache crack more.

"momma…my peepee hurts." cori cried as she was trying to wipe away the blood that was till pouring out of her.

"oh god, sweetie, ma'am, were getting help right now." the clerk says while rushing out to get a doctor.

We sat down and cori was hysterical. She was fidgety and screaming for Ashley and I, all I could do was hold her close and hope for a miracle. Oh god I need a miracle…

I was put on a stretcher right away, as cori was taken by the doctors. I winced and flinched repeatedly as they poked and prodded at my rib cage. They told me I broke my entire left half of my rib segments. No wonder it hurt like hell. I blacked out a few times but when I finally came to I would immediately ask where ash and cori were. The last time I blacked out was medical induced. They put me to sleep while they surgically removed the rib bone from my lung, almost causing it to collapse.

"uuuugh…" a mumble escapes me as I opened my eyes to see that I was in a hospital room.

"cori?" panic set ina nd I looked to the door. "ash?!"

"Spencer its okay. Im right here." someone said from beside me. I looked to my left and saw another bed in the room. Ashley was sitting up and reading a magazine as Gracie was sitting in a chair beside her, a bored expression in her face.

"where's cori?" I asked fearfully, thoughts went through me and my breathing started to thin out.

"she's getting some stitches…he ripped something important with his finger nails.." she said quietly anger replaced my fear and sadness overlapped both of them.

I looked at her with tears falling from my sad, worn eyes. " im so sorry ash…I should of protected her more. There's no excuse why I didn't." I said. Looking down ,I played with the flower designs on the off-white bedspread.

"Spence its okay, u do have an excuse. You broke an entire rib cage segment. I wouldn't be moving to fast either." she said. She slowly got up and hobbled over to my bed and sat down by my side.

"u know, even though she has gotten hurt Spence, it doesn't mean that I blame you. I should of known he would come back for her." she began. "when she was 1 I had gotten anonymous letters saying he would come back for her. So I should have been prepared." I look up to her and the tears stopped abruptly when she smiled at me.

"its not your fault Spence." she whispered to me again. I nodded my head and laid back down. I guess I fell asleep because next thing I know I wake up to the soft singing of a beautiful little girl.

"I wov ooh

Ooh wove me

Wets hang bwarnee fwom a twee…" i open my eyes and cori is sitting on my lap and petting my hair like a dog. Nice cor-cor.

"hi baby." I say softly. Her brown eyes light up suddenly and im being embraced into a hug. "mommy, guess what? I was put in this machine and I had to stay very still. And then it went in a tunnel and I cud not talk." she rambled. "and then they put me to sleep with a needle." she pouted at that part and kissed her little bottom lip

"wow honey that's a lot…are u okay?" I asked She looked at me and smiled softly, looking just like her mom. She knew that I wasn't talking about the I.V

"im okay mommy. But my middle hurts a real lot." she said and pointed in between her legs. She sniffled bravely and kissed me cheek chastely

"I bet it does sweetie." I look over and Ashley is signing papers , the seat that Gracie sat in before was now empty

"Where's Grace?" I sit up more and grunted from the pain that ripped through my chest. When I was finally in a good position I was out of breath with a red face.

"she left with her foster parents." she tells me and purses her lips eyeing my condition. She winks at me with a small smile and goes back to papers she held.

"what are u writing?" I peered over at the stack of papers on her lap, a blue pen sitting in hr left hand…humph. She's Left handed? Focus Spencer!

"the release forms, we get to go home on Tuesday. All of us." she said. "and this one is a permission form for security out side our room…you know, just incase." I nod my head and smile brightly. "I cant wait to go home." I whisper with Cori's head nodding in agreement.

I hear ash make a small noise in response and lick my lips. "you're alright… right?" my voice was small, and I immediately chastised myself fro sounding insecure and vulnerable. I should be the strong one. For her.

She sighs and bites her lip, her golden eyes shut tightly and she swallows almost painfully. She lets out a shaky breath and looks back to me, her eyes shed unwanted tears and I wish I could walk over and wipe them away.

"I will be." she whispers and takes a glance at the blonde little girl who still sat on my lap. Her hands and eyes were busy tracing the pattern on the hospital bedspread while humming a tune to herself. Her blond curls bounced and I was immediately filled with protectiveness for her. For both of them.

My girls.

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